I had a Dorothy-esque moment this week. It happened in the middle of the grocery store. I had just combed the store for a twenty dollar bill that had fallen out of my coat pocket. I even went so far as to ask two clerks if it had been turned in. My pathetically hopeful inquiry was met with boorish laughter and, as I walked away from the customer service desk, I heard one clerk joke to the other, "Hey man, has $200 been turned in..." It was at that point that I turned to Henry and said, "We're not in Provo anymore." The only time I ever lost my wallet in Provo, it was returned that same afternoon with every credit and debit card, dollar and loose cent still in place. I know I got unusually lucky to have such an honest soul find my lost wallet that day, but I'm pretty sure that I never would have been so rudely laughed at if I had asked a Macey's clerk about missing money. Anyway, getting back to the story, I've a pretty tender heart when it comes to feeling picked on, so I left the store in tears, wishing that there could be a little more human, and less ill-mannered being, in some human beings. I called Nate when I got home and explained what had happened, all the while wondering what he'd say about how to account for that $20 in the budget, hoping above hope that it wouldn't have to come out of "Em's Fun Fund." (There is, as you all know, not an ounce of "Fun" in misplaced money.) He was, of course, very kind and sympathetic about it and I think we'll put it in the seldom used, but occasionally necessary, "Oops! Forgot to Zip My Coat Pocket," expense category.
The only good thing about a week that starts with lost money is that it usually can only get better from there...this week proved no exception. Wednesday morning we woke up to a most negligable skiff of snow; just enough white dust to make the roads in the metroplex too dangerous for the morning commuters. Nate got to work from home, so we took advantage of the unusual arrangement and stayed in bed a little...(ok, a lot,) later than usual. The only thing pressing enough to get us out of bed was our rumbling stomachs. At about ten o'clock I went to the kitchen and got three cups of yogurt and three spoons and we enjoyed a liesurely breakfast in bed. As he slurped down yogurt, Henry's cheeky grin and inquisitive little expression seemed to ask, "Is this heaven?" No Henry, this is just "owgowt" in "mama bed." After days on end of the corporate rat race, though, it felt pretty heavenly to all of us to lounge cozily in bed together.
Funny, isn't it, how we look back retrospectively through such rosey lenses. I'm trying to forget the fact that our son eats with manners that very nearly resemble...oh...let me think...SHREK'S! So while we did enjoy the laziness, there were more than a few skids of crusty raspberry yogurt left behind to serve as reminders of the morning.
Nate and I have had many-a-life-planning conversation recently. He and corporate auditing are like oil and water--no matter how vigorously they are forced together, they just don't mix. So we talk about ways out, career options, where we want to live, what we want our life to look like in the long term. Honestly, though, I want it to look a lot like it does right now--only I want Nate's heart to be smiling.
This has been such a revealing and empowering growing season. Sometimes my soul feels like it's going to burst open with so much invigoration and discovery. I LOVE TEXAS! I don't know that I necessarily love the place as much as I love the experience. I love the almost imperceivable bonding moments that happen as we tear down ugly wallpaper and personal inhibitions and put ourselves way "out there" to meet new friends and make a family a thousand miles away from our relatives. I love the fact that I can now not only get myself to the grocery store and Target, but that I am discovering some great little hole-in-the-wall joints that the long-time-Texans frequent. I love the word y'all. I love meeting new people and hearing their stories.
We had such fun this evening with our new friends. I hoped I would love Sarah from the minute I saw her. And tonight, as we were both ogling over obseenly priced, but cuter than cute, funky, European clothes in Johnnie Boden's Spring catalog, I knew I would...love her! I love discovering that there are people that I share common quirks and passions with--who grew up several states away from me. When we have our life-planning chats, (I can't believe I'm saying this, but,) I get sad to think about getting back too close to my "comfort zone," because I don't want this discovery and growth to stop.
We're not in Provo anymore...and I love it! We'll never be where we've been because life has a beautiful way of picking you up and taking you with it and evolving you into a stronger, deeper, less fearful, less home-sick, more complete...person, who belongs to a little family knit more tightly together with more durable love than ever before.